Recently, I decided to explore the offerings of small independent perfume houses I'd never tried before. Some of my experiences have been very positive, and so far three have led to purchases. One, however, hasn't been much fun.
I ordered a selection of samples from this company, waited a few weeks, and eventually received a shipping notification. Unfortunately, the shipping notification email showed an address that was not mine. It had some similar letters and numbers in it, but the wrong zip code. I checked my original order confirmation, just in case I had fat-fingered something. No, there was my correct address, exactly as I'd entered it.
The shipping notification instructed me to reply if there were any problems. So I did. Crickets. So I forwarded the notification to the perfume house, explaining the situation. At this point, the package hadn't even been handed over to USPS, so I hoped there might still be an opportunity to correct the address.
The response? "If the package is returned to me, I can re-send it."
Wow. Now, I wasn't expecting the proprietor to leap onto a scooter and intercept the mail truck personally. But perhaps an apology? An offer to contact the shipping service? Some indication that getting my purchase into my actual hands was a priority?
A few days later, I replied that the package was scheduled for delivery and asked what would happen if the recipient didn't return it to her.
"If the package is delivered, I will re-ship it. Non-delivery is purely hypothetical at this point." I wasn't entirely sure what she meant by that first sentence, since she'd previously indicated that she would re-ship only if the package was returned. And I wasn't questioning whether the package would be delivered. I was questioning to whom.
Sure enough, USPS eventually marked the package delivered. To someone else. That is, not to me. So I contacted the proprietor again, pointing out that since I had provided the correct address, I expected to receive my order regardless of whether the original package found its way back to her.
In her latest response, the proprietor assured me that if the original package wasn't returned, she would eventually replace my order or issue a refund. Good! That's all I wanted to hear in the first place. Unfortunately, she also informed me that the situation was the fault of USPS, automation, AI, and the general deterioration of delivery services. Which was fascinating, since none of those things explained how the wrong address ended up on the shipping label before USPS received the package.
As a small business owner myself, I understand that shipping mistakes happen. I've had to replace shipments of my hand-crafted, one-of-a-kind jewelry items, or offer refunds, when things got lost in the mail, so I would never hold an honest mistake against another small business. But! I do judge them by their response to something that has gone wrong. The very first thing that the proprietor should have typed into her email was "I'm sorry!" followed by "Let me see what I can do to fix this." Two simple sentences that go a long way in assuring the customer that the seller does indeed actually want their business.
The whole exchange has inspired a fragrance that I urge the perfumer to add to her line. It should be called Obtuse: Eau d'Indifference.
Tagline: I don't care.
Top Notes: Delayed gratification, misplaced parcels, poor customer service
Heart Notes: Deflection, condescension, blame accord
Base Notes: Lingering resentment, wounded goodwill, a lost sale
The sillage of this stuff is enormous. You can detect the attitude from several ZIP codes away. It also has exceptional longevity and projection (although in the wrong direction). The availability? It's somewhere, just not where you want it. Kind of like the opposite of Visa ("Everywhere you want to be.")
At this point, I'm not even interested in her fragrances. I've given her 10 business days to wait for the returned package; if it doesn't turn up I'd rather have a refund. But if the samples do eventually make their way to me, I will simply pass them on to someone else, without opening. I might have loved the fragrances, and was entirely prepared to purchase a bottle if something captivated me. Now, I honestly don't care. There are thousands of perfumes in the world, many created by independent artisans who manage to combine creative talent with basic courtesy. I don't need to fall in love with something made by a person whose customer-service philosophy seems to be "not my problem" and "it's AI's fault."
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Posted by theminx on Minxstinks
Note: this post is my opinion. I am not affiliated with the companies mentioned in this post or any other companies.
